Friday, February 20, 2009

Some days I feel like this....


Do you take enough pills to feel like this? I do. In order to get well, I take prescription meds as well as lots of vitamins and supplements. To tell the truth, I take about 40-45 pills a day...mostly supplements, but probably too many prescription meds...but you know what, I need most of them desperately.

Sometimes I wonder what the hell happened to my body to have broken down like this in my mid-forties. I am better then I was this time last year, and much better than I was this time two years ago. I am beginning to think I will never *be* well, but always *getting* well. And, that sucks!

I don't have the discipline to eat perfectly, exercise regularly, and take care of myself ultimately. Frankly, I wonder how people do it. Most days I barely can make it out of bed to get the kids to school. I push myself through the day. Now I make it through, now, better than I used to...but I am so sick of myself! I am so tired of being tired and unproductive (actually, I am probably more productive than lots of people, but I feel like I am working, still, at 1/2 or 1/4 speed anymore).

Oh, the whines of middle-age...that is probably what this is...


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